During my pilates and yoga session last week, my instructor, Heidy, asked me to visualize and then share three goals that I have for the new year. I think that I masked it, but I was surprised at how much I struggled to recite a list on demand. I had several goals for the new year swimming around in my head; however, my daily hustle had not yet allowed me the time to reflect upon and prioritize them. The following day, my mom and I went to see the movie “Top 5.” With the concept of the movie and my session with Heidy serving as inspiration, I came up with my own “Top 5” for 2015.
1) Give God the Glory
Shamefully, I have been a fairweather Christian over the years. In times of despair, my prayer knows no limit. When life is manageable and good, my prayer is almost nil. God has been merciful in so many ways at so many times in my life (his greatest mercy being the birth of my healthy baby following a high-risk pregnancy). Who am I to take a single blessing for granted when I have truly been blessed beyond measure? This year will mark the renewal of my faith, prayer, and praise as I give God all the glory.
2) Show Love to my Loved Ones
The daily demands of motherhood, work, the transition into the career of my dreams, along with a whole bunch of other “stuff,” has me running from the minute my feet hit the floor in the morning until I put them up at night. Days, weeks, even months have flown by without some family and friends hearing from me for weeks at a time. Single-parenthood does not give me a pass on my responsibility to stay connected to those I love. With my son now in a nursery school with generous hours of operation, my plan is to show those I love that I love them by staying in touch. That may come in the form of a breakfast or early dinner, a walk in the park, or getting together for coffee or drinks. I’ll take anything that gives me some face time with those who mean the most to me. And at times when my schedule does not permit a face-to-face get together, quick “checking on you” calls from the car, “thinking about you” texts, or “what’s going on” emails will be the norm. Tomorrow is not promised to any of us. No more will I behave as if it is.
3) Continue My Fitness Journey
In early 2014, I could no longer deny, even to myself, that I needed to do something about my weight. I was not the worst example of postpartum weight gain, but I was definitely a far cry from my smallest and healthiest self. My son was also one year-old, so the “baby weight” excuse had more than run its course.
Last Spring, I finally put action behind my words and reconnected with Heidy (yes, same Heidy from above), who years ago was my personal trainer at the New York Sports Club. She had whipped me into the best physical shape of my life. I was psyched to hear that she now operated her own pilates and yoga studio. I had dabbled in both while tagging along with my mom to her classes during my visits to Florida, and enjoyed them very much. I thought that the resistance training and stretching would be a great way to begin getting in shape. Almost a year later, I am happy to say that I am still committed. Have I reached my goal weight? No. Am I closer to it than I was a year ago? Yes. Will I continue on my health and fitness journey? Definitely. And that is progress of which I am proud.
4) Write, Write, and Write Some More
Writing is on the short list of my greatest joys. Always has been, always will be. I probably should have gotten a Masters degree in Fine Arts (and I still may) as opposed to a law degree. In many ways, I am sure that I would have been a happier camper. But, all these years later, I am finally pursuing what I feel is my gift and makes me happy. In 2014, I mustered the courage to begin to tell my story regardless of any possible judgment or scrutiny. This year, I will continue to tell my story as it unfolds–the good, and hopefully, not too much of the bad and ugly.
5) Be Charitable
Even on days when I feel like I am struggling in every way possible as a single parent, my struggle pales in comparison to many other single moms. I share details of my unintended journey so that other single mothers know that someone else is walking in similar shoes, that being a single mom is sometimes hard and most times beautiful, that we are strong, resilient, and that shame has no place in our story.
I plan to give of my time and resources to organizations that support mothers and children. For obvious reasons, supporting them is a cause that will forever be a major part of my life. Whether parenting alone by choice or circumstance, single-parenthood definitely takes a village, and I will do my part to uplift the village.
So there you have it. My “Top 5” for 2015.
Thank you for reading, following, and supporting Mommy in the Middle: Adventures of a Dazed, Crazed, and Amazed Middleaged Mom.
Make it a great 2015!